2016 was a weird one.

1: What did you do in 2016 that you’d never done before?
Got fired, lived alone, kissed a boy, cried over a boy at a party, went to a club, drove to Hasting ahaha.

2: Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don't think i made any? Yup i think i have a few for this year?

3: Did anyone close to you give birth?

No?? One of my friends is pregnant with twinz tho! (chey)

4: Did anyone close to you die?

Not really but people close to me lost people close to them. Koro Starr, nyjils mum,  spud. 

5: What countries did you visit?

England but das it!

6: What would you like to have in 2017 that you lacked in 2016

Hoe skillz haaaahaaa. Less stress and drama, more adventures.

7: What dates from 2016 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

18th September 2016 ahahah. 2nd of July my party was a good one even though i don't remember much that happened that night ahahah. Octber 3rd just coz thats when i went to England ahahah. 

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Hoooh is it bad that i cant think of any? First one that comes to mind is just that week that mum was in hospital and i had to fully take over ahaha, looking after the boys and dad at home, cashing cheques, all of dads Arb stuff, visiting mum like twice a day AND planning my dumb party ahahhaha. Aw and getting my full liscense!!!

9: What was your biggest failure?

This whole year kinda feels like a fail idk?? Ummmm

10: Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nope don't think so. Mum did though her elbow, hospital for 10 days.

11: What was the best thing you bought?

Ticket to england, my big ass $10 square bowls that i made ton buy too ahahah, umm all my dvd's ahah.

12: Whose behaviour merited celebration?

Ton! She's badass, she moved to england got job after job, has friends, is putting her self way out there and she's loving it. I'm so proud of her and how well she's doing.

13: Whose behaviour made you appalled?

F*ckboissss. Two in particular ahahah, but yeah they're gross. And hun when she broke my car door.

14: Where did most of your money go?

On takeaways literally thats all me and ton spent our money on in the flat.

15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Cheys 18th in Sugar!! Um getting my car???

16: What song will always remind you of 2016?

Ohhh maybe like 7 years?? just coz it was the most played ahahah i don't have one that sticks out really.

17: Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? 

I just got back from being depressed in england so right now im sadder but the year is already looking better in comparison to last year.

18: What do you wish you’d done more of?

Ummm maybe drunk more?? AHAHAHAH but otherwise school was algood, aw maybe exercise more?

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?

Fkn hell eat less takeaways ahahah. Cried over boys ahah.

20: How did you spend Christmas?

Hectic as hell in England with all the babies, literally the most exhausting day omg, like literally no time to just chill and take a break. So expensive buying all perfect presents for everyone.

21: Did you fall in love in 2016?

Nah just spent it chasing all the wrong boys that will never be good enough ahahah ole.

22: What was your favourite TV program?

How to get away with murder!!! Orange is the new black will always be fave! Between? did i watch that this year? And i watched shortland st with Katie ahahahah.

23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Katie AHAHAH. Darcy. 

24: What was the best book you read?

I dont even know how to read.

25: What was your greatest musical discovery?

OMI, Leon, ZAYN omggg, Marc E Bassy, Frank Ocean, Michael Buble, Lady Gaga, James Arthur yehhh. Had playlists every month and i really liked that so will probably do that this year.

26: What did you want and get?

A job. A level 2 Maori Certificate. Drunk memories

27: What did you want and not get?

A boyfriend. Ummm

28: What was your favourite film of this year?

Aw Moana!! Hunt for the Wilderpeople was good, watched it twice at the movies. Split!!! Oh nah definitely Me Before You!

29: What's one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Living in Flat 16 Rawiri St. So many good memz made and friendships grown.

30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2016?

Hoodies, gumboots, leggings, sunglasses, black and white t-shirts, comfy clothes for looking after babies and cleaning houses 

31: What kept you sane?

My momma. Always.

32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Miles Teller and JC Caylen

33: What political issue stirred you the most?

None really soz I'm a typical teenager stuck in their own little world! And that makes me feel real bad oi!

34: Who did you miss?

Ton! 

35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2016.

You can be nice but you need to know when to say no and stand your ground. Take time to look after yourself. 

2016 Memz

Ton when she was like do you ever just feel like smashing all these pavlova?

Hohepa at the checkout "Wouldn't wanna smash the pavlova"

Why is he so chill gonna pull a gun out

That's me on the front of the paper

Hohepa pulling the loser sign to me and ton

The lasers not working coz someone tripped over the cord ahahaha at the fireworks omg!!

Someone clapping at the end of the song

OMG a bird EW I FELT SOMETHING it was a bird

I need a loan from the bank to buy a house, sam you'll be home in two weeks

So you're not gonna get "laid" "Sunday off" "no, to both"

What's that necklace on the mirror. Aw the lady left it here to clear the spirits from when she died in the car. Bless her heart on the back window.

Let's sit outside! No I don't wanna look like someone on the streets

I'm a memer

What are the options we do to them

What's a gif? That's like Harry Potter and we're muggles

And kill Zack coz we don't  give a fuck about him HAHAHAAH mum and aunty debbie playing kiss marry kill

Elijah Woods that lil cute one

"I wanna go to America" "you do that sam the sooner the better"

"Why don't you save people's number?" "I don't know how to" MUM 

"Play that song rai!" "That looks like a song I don't like"

If u had a twin and they were in jail would u go see them. You look like me but I'm free

Would u get 666 on your knuckles yup coz it'll be 999, now watch me whip now watch me nine nine

Me running

He looks like bruno Mars

Haere ki te moe nga manu, he looked away

Fuck cuz how's the cousins kids

Kia ora CUZZY!

Kaore au ka talk

Kaore au ka speaka da language

I'm just ahau a hoe

I was getting lyrics on my phone. Eazy biggie titties

Biggie titties sounds chiddy chiddy bang bang chiddy titties tang tang

"You gave me a fright" ahaha ayva

Keep still now

I don't see it

"This is my sensitive time" TON OMG

Why is everyone at bowls? Bowls is life

Car tryna drive past,  green doesn't mean go

Planes going over "Where's the lollies"

The waters beautiful

Hori flashing the guy while getting changed

Do you remember us.  Our teacher was wearing the fishnet

I want someone who doesn't talk. Ole Ariel, that's fishy bro

Can't keep my hands off myself

Churchur

FK hickey, what? I said hey sissy

Gizz us a borrow of your bike, of your clothes

It's englandese

I'm going back into the closet

I'm very dry and I want a paint job

Fuck or not Rais message to king

"This might be your house but this is my night"

If kaata had a twin and if I went out with kaata

"Is there a difference between weed and marijuana" TON 

There's orphan is the new black

Hi shut up Ellen

Rrrai

Hallelujah!

I broke my elbow oi!

Brandon loosing Ayva then getting stung

I like ass I'm an ass man

Who was ur last gf? I don't know and I don't remember

Why don't u take me to the ball? Coz ur too old AHAHAH HOHEPA 

Whispering eye

I'm learning with friends

Did you hear about that mongrel mob funeral?  Yeah I assassinated him

I have an upset stomach

"I call her britz" "oh I just call her bitch"

Flaxmere being hella dangerous

Hacking into huruteas Bosses United video account

Parking far as away from town in havelock north 

Hurutea dribbling food out

Is the pie alright?

"Do you know this girl Nicolesha?" Ahahahahah Colesh's dad 

Oh my goodness turn it up!

Wow they're taking it riiiiiiiiight back to the 80's

Kaata wearing his uniform to a party, repping tk

No no jahman (no no drama)

Ton applying for a job saying her whole mihi on voice recording ahahaha to that cafe on fb

3 parties. 2. Yeah but there'll be one later on hahaha hopeful as

Who have i been looking at? Who haven't you been looking at

Oh I know this one it sounds like aloe vera

Purerehua nahi ahah Josephs butter knife

Ton calling a pie a pizza

She's got a tattoo of a nose piercing ahahah ton about that girl at netball

You're boring when you're sober darcy to me at netball

"I only have a singlet under this." "What a show off" darcy to me

Is that her? Yup. Doesn't look like her? Do you know what she looks like? No ahaha mum about summer

Do my mihi come in a moko on and wear my korowai

"I know he won't like you coz ur ugly" Dione about me meeting her boyfriend

What if I just zyzzed her head

Donny seeing that hansim fulla in the car by the roundabout him like reaching his arm out

Tons ugly as east sign

My gesture to the honey aisle

Loever and Malways AHAHAH horis sign

"He might think I'm getting with sheldon" ahahah angel about morere

Who's that's sexy mofo over there in the red

I like his skins angel I TAP THAT

Which way is the fastest? Straight through the rugby field

Tristan getting hundy into the boys doing pressups at the clubrooms AHAHAHA

It's just moana without the n. I just say koala with a m.

Butterflies fly away Purerehua action Nodding my hips

KFC is my mating call

Fuck everybody go to bed!

Ole look at you! Look at your black face

You and me got a whole lot of pornography, please clear my history, I could walk forver KAATA AHAH

Shayne singing 3 little birds in spanish

Kaata slapping Hunny with steak

Totiti wera

Let's have a long race

That little girl was looking straaaaight at my nipple, kaata at morere 

And he was emo oh no

Skideez nuts 21 21

Hoheparena Papa John

Ole roll the T ttttoni with a potae

Where's the parties at? Currie street ole Burrie streeeeeeet with a potae

Gregors fringe looking like zlata

Jofish Origins

Our name together would be Clintana, ole chlamydia AHAHA when i asked hun if she'd ever go out with someone called Clint

Ka pai tu meke

Rai laughing in the shower at her butt cheek mark

Hohepa standing in the lunch room creepy at pakkas

"I love it" Rai to the chocolate

At KFC and tryna hook Rai up with boys accross the street "check her out"

Shall we go hang out with tem. Oh don't tease me now

Ton screaming in the car at Rais tongue bar me thinking it was a dick pic

Not knowing what a drive by was

Come on son here to pick u up ahahahahaha at rugby and ton cracked up

Rai screaming coz we found the park and ton getting scared at the roundabout

"Get the fk outta my lap I didn't ask for this dance" AHAHHA at hockey!

I love girls

Is it too late now to say sorry me: yes ahahaah Kewa

I'm like yeah I'm bored (she's fine)

He said raaaaai raaaaai Donald sounding like a deer

Straight up dog she stands about 5'4......ngaaaa ahahah hori finishing the song

Well it's not you're b day tonight is it?

Idk Smoke the BUTTS

I can't skull I can zip nah I lick I put it in a a bowl

Bly kicking the bowl of chips off the seat omg

Do you know what an evaporater yeah when you put fruit and it gets dried that's a dehydrater

Punch you in the pants

Bly and jurnee dancing and bly falling on the ground

"Say b l y needs the k e y" "can she spell??" Chey about Ayva

I got some weed.

AHAHAH BLY Do you want some ecstasy

Ole the Randall girls ole Matt

Fkn crazy car running over the cones

When you were a featal

They're a $1.80 at Blue dairy ole they're a $1 at pakkas. I know my pies.

*Phone goes off* Why did you even check your pocket Donald?

Who wants to wax my legs? Ole you get weirder by the minute

Bark off

Donald we're outta cans go rob the pub

Saying a curse on Donalds kids and grandkids. Amene

Kehua expert ole ghost buster ton

What makes me feel sick about it? 50 70 50

There's our boys

Drive by CAN WE GET A

Singing energy Ole we just needed a taster not a whole concert ole get on the car car alarm backup music AHAHAHHAHAHAHA

Seeing jazz and Fahey and choking on my hair

Wc wipe crack

Raimaree licking the key

Do yous have a way of packing. We put all the hard stuff together ole hard stuff alcohol no lunch for you this week kids AHAHHA RAI

4 men and 3 women

Where's the MALIBU??

Who's ur boyfriend this week?

Me and bly throwing drinks at eachother

I'm gonna email ur mum HAHAHA me to courtney

She thinks I'm at a sleepover Courtney

Bailey is a ballies

Turtle head when the shits in the ring

Ton Where's the scissors I know you smoke dope AHAHAH KAYNE

He looked like stan walker. That's his day job, fixing roads

SATURDAAAAY Friday I'm in love

I need a pee, I needa fart. Well don't shart

Roto is a rrrake

Wonder what montys studying something to do with the earth? Why? Coz he can play piano

Nah with 75 one for each country. Um how many countries are there ton?

Nah yeah and we'll play with guns. Ole how are you gonna get guns on a plane.

Yeah then just shoot them it'll be fun. Oh my favourite game, murder.

Do you still do to bike thing in bed? Like this AHAHA NOT LIKE THAT

Can I get extra beef AW MY GOD CAMERON ORDERING MACDONALDS

Gonna go see my nan and have a feed then might go for a hunt hahaha random guy at Warehouse

You're embarrassing us as a unit! Fkn Tyrone

Half brows 

Your eyebrows are the opposite of on fleek they're off kleef

Whare pakaru

Can u get me a plastic bag yep

Hooking Ayvas pants on her chair when I got her out

Bly falling outta the truck

Who's bly? Who's kayne? Whaaaaat they had a baby? Drunk as jessie

That's just life aye

Ooh 12 I have 12 tinder matches

Ole gisborne that's ugly it's not limited to gisborne. Opotiki? Nah whakatane? Ole just travel down for a slay

I wanna cut my hair like Khloe Kardashian, I dunno who that is but okay

Lexine Banks? Oh I know her!

Do you reckon she'll reply? Which one? All the hoes AHAHAH DRUNK AS JESSIE

Call out to Ata *does sign language*

Oh hell doing the sprinkler

He was making eye contact with me? Aw no he was making eye contact with me ahahah the hot as guys from boys

Rai kiri wants a fight. Tell her to come here, square up

Afternoon oh no just noon

Shots shots shots ole first night out terrorist attacks all Maoris survived

Ole by the bins where we belong.

Ole by my ex 

 got a pizza under my bed so I'm sussed

THIS IS BORING ash at Cheys birthday!

Ole fucken idiot that's ur name

Ole yous are so tall in heaven. Yeah ur in hell where u belong

I'll give u something to cry about slaps rubbish bin

Huka kotiro

"Snitches get stitches." "I want some."

"Take one for the team and drive." "Fuck the team"

Yass cat

Is that a yass

Mems it's memes me-me's

Call me Lynn Brown AHAH jurnee

Ole mum and the mongrel mob di dog mungi di

Singing HSM with jurnee

Konichiwa tone tone twaaaaaaaat egg foo twat sweet and sour balls dim sum 3some

"Ole Jordy mister big raho" "how would you know have you seen it? " "NAH TONI TOLD ME!"

"What's the time over there?" "It's ten past nine at night time" "GO TO BED THEEEEEN" okay Maybs my apologies for tryna stay up to talk to you lot

STOOOOP

Whip the steering wheel over

I'M ON LEVEL 5 BITCHES

Dress ripping ass video

Tukutuku grass

Fucks mummy's

She was looking at you roy. Yell out to her THAT'S MY BF nah he's gay!! He sucks his dick

That means you got it in the ass. Fucken oats

I got a lolly. Ahahah creepy as Maia

Calling donny Donna at the Chinese shop

Cha cha ahahah hunny not knowing the words to HSM

Kani Kani tahi AHHAAHAHAHA kaata

I know what a deke is

Let's hold feet

Stop crying you can't wash it! Nadine about Erinas Pa pillow

Ginny ahahah the way angel said it

Angel driving manual and me spilling my drink all over me ahahah

Country song comes on. This one's for u Ellen fkn Kiana and angel AHAHAHHA

Kianas impression of angel, HI MY FATBOY GIRL

Fishy Fishy do u have a qweef

Yeah somewhere

Andrea and chase being the ultimate twins

Mascarrra. Jade.

Everyone has to keep drinking till I stop. OLE haven't even started. Sheldon

Tone it down yup yup AAAAAHHH. Joey and hun.

Hunnys hair catching the ping pong ball

Raimaslut

Colesh cuff her pants

What the FUCK hunny

Sucking ass for money 😂😂

You have crabs? Oh I wish. ole donald

Yous have had your day now it's ours

Jade grabbing the top of the ciggy

Eric getting offended jade didn't throw the wet toilet paper at him

Eric playing "i'll make love to you" for tyrone!

Tyrone and Eric fast walking 😂

This girl Ellen added me on facebook omg Brad 

Dont drop my undies skiddy side up ahahahahaha angel at the laundromat

Ropata flicking his wrist at my car outside london fish and chips

16 and roots mums

Do a burnout fkn roy

I had a bad experience ahah angel about everything

Angel falling in the oven when she was little

Angel getting a fright from the cat jumping in the window in the shed

Violence free tairawhiti ahaha at tyrones I think it was toots

I'm growing a flower don't run it over Darcy tryna kick it over and falling AHAHAH

To boys a roots a root ole mum

Shall we have sex? No its daytime ahahaha omg Kaata when we drove to the beach

I learnt some things today. How to watch Gregor break something ahah all the boys in the car and the steering wheel locked.

What if TK was like that. That'd be sad. No drinking, no dancing, basically no being a hoe. Emily and them will have to move

That's the first thing you say when u wake up, someone died aw me and rai

"That car must smell like stink nutz, wonder what this car smells like?"

"What's if u pissed the bed with the electric blanket on, would u get a shock?" Hori

Are you gonna know anyone there? Yeah all my exs 

Aw it's just down the road. Aw u can walk. Ole get a boat, a kayak nah a waka

You can walk ur ass

THERE'S NOTHING EVEN OUT THERE ahahah Gregor when tiggy squealed 

Dad plugging the four plug into itself 

I already got paid? Well what if u don't do a good job? That would only happen if one of them died. Well maybe I'll kill one of them.

Yeah she posted on my window

You don't needa be pretty for puha 

Do you watch her ex on the beach

Ole squash me in the door like a toastie

Aurrah tana 

Going on Jessie's tinder. Nice jugs ma gal

I want it back oh you want it bad 

Can I have a puff. Karaka Rd????

Only sexy bitches in my dreams. Aw yeah me.

Me and jade sleeping standing up and rawiri coming in

You're not gonna toastie me! No ill crunch you in half

Nearly hitting that old man coz he didn't check the street then getting a fright

"Dont look ellen" fkn hansim Tristan gonna kiss angel

My mum said ur friendly going to all the parties

Who's your date tonight? Nelson dogg

Look at ur mums work colleague. Brad about Ariz 

Ole R. Ellie 

Ole lost all ur baby fat Jordan about Jade!

Bye niece. Oh okay bye uncle AHAHA Nelson 

We had a BBQ and had some leg chops

Aww she lives in hastings. Aw Hawkes Bay

Jessie's mate on the bike picking his nose and eating it

If you're gonna tell a story don't stutter AHAHA JESSIE

He's not even hot. He is now I'd bend him over 

Fried day and Fri yay

Cmhtfu 

What's that? Mem awww when my voice went ugly

I'll give you half. Ole who's that? 

Fucking with the girl nek door

Nice to nice to know ya yoza 

Measuring everyone's height with armspan, I know coz my auntys a doctor

Ole white bitch ellen

One of yous has to be Donald ole I'll be the cat

Bye Keisha AHAHAH BLY

You pulled up my back fat

People over 90 only, angel about the sign at pakkas

Do u get any pulaul  AHAH all tristans work mates

Angel grabbing Clads hand to grabbed the basket 

Are you coming in? Yeah I wanna experience it ole at bulk barn

Why is there so much people here on a Thursday? Oh Benny day

Which one do u plug out? 

Ah-ahrika E-lehleh-en Raimar-eheh 

Have u seen suicide squad yet? Nah Idc about that. Well no one cares about u.

Wait do you have a shower here? Ole jessie

Hit you on the shoulder 

We're not a kapa haka group

OMG I can see knickers 

HUAWEI

Ole bei bracking it. AHAHAH Brad to Mikey rude as

Bly getting a fright from jade walking thru the door.

Chicken chip sandwich bread

Bly throwing the bread down 

She doesn't want u I'll have u boy. Bly talking to the banana

Bly reading her book upside down

Safety before teamwork AHAHAH Kani turning off the gas at the marae

You see u mean much more than a midnight booty call BLYS RAP

Can for a pash? AHAH EW JORDAN

I'm a nanny. For the children? 

Roger 

I wouldn't expect you to understand

Nivea will get em, 24/7 

Changing into 2nd gear

"Elz is my straightner in the car?" "Oh i'll go check later" "At go check now"

Faaar my backs mean, my arms are muscly, my legs are so good

2 hunnuk

Lip bum

*open the closet* ole are u a celebrity or something AHAHAH

You're a hard lady 

You don't even know what paru is AHAH talking about my hair

Yous would be a crack up as couple, he'd be out there selling and you'd be on his case 

But I'm not tall tho? AHAHAH OOOH MY GOH

Why are ur eyes open? Coz I wanna see your face

That bird is sussing me out

Oosh receipts, you needa clean these out.

You needa stop letting boys in ur bed 

Jaspal Rapatapu 

Kaata and Brandon eating their chocolates on stage at prizegiving

"We're all like fishes going the same one" angel about the cars ahahaha

Not lost I'm found *smashes mirror* fk sakes twinnie

"If I was to stab someone in the act of self defence I'd be pretty proud of myself"

Back in the labour weekend of 2013

Okay I'll hang up in 3 2 1

Ayva look into my camera CHEY TRYNA TAKE A PHOTO at ayvas birthday 

If u have a note 7 please turn it off AHAHAHA

Why is there a needle in your nose ahah mable

My cracks up his nose

Are you my godfather? 

Ha ha ha why are you mean? 

He never comes over coz he's old ahaha May about mo

Florence is my bestfriend, yeah she doesn't like me though 

Would everyone like some milk? COWS FOR ME!!

I heard Harry jump off my bed, I thought it was a rat Ahahah percy

I like dinner.

Can I come? Yay. I get to come

I wish I had a boyfriend Mable making a wish on a dandelion ahaha

You knuckled my wrist

Turn the radio up! "Do you have a lung disease?" aw heck the ad on the radio 

"Who the fuck are they?" "Hii girls!" AHAHHAHA when me and ton were looking out the window and phil heard us 

Dave locking Phil in the garage "it's a sacrifice worth making!"

*watching me before you* "ellie have you seen my new Digger?" 

"All good in the hood, do u know what that means?" "Yeah the ghetto"

Wellow AHAH my favourite place in england

That lorry is lit 

Phoebe smell my hand

I know you love him coz he's a good boy, Nana talking about dad

Dan eating five bowls of rice and turning to bonnie saying "What's wrong with you?" stoned stories

"Let's play a word game every word is the next letter in the alphabet" "okay hat" 

Nana picking up the bag with her stick and throwing it down the stairs

"Did you hear the about John Key resigning" "HE DIED??" 

Hey Elz  may

*gives Percy a kiss after he washed his face* "aww you're all wet" *goes and dries face* "now give me a kiissssss" 

I'm saving my sweeties for summer holidays

"Have you ever seen a reindeer?" "Yeah on the television"

"James from little orchard is on the naughty list" "Why?" "He didn't share his cake"

Nana talking about how the royal family just eat normal cereal

Mabel only being happy when the baddie came on 

Dan falling asleep at the panto 

Ellie and Tommy

2015 Memz

Bonnie getting me Harry styles for Christmas

When I was a baby I was born

My dad has one of these Aw does he use it? No, Florrie about the bike

Grandad knowing who one direction was on the news

At work training, George acting like a girl "ooh girls lets get some wine"

Yeah sometimes we have dinner on the deck

Mabel dialling 666

Nana always waving when leaving the drive way, even if noones there

Mabel saying Alan Carr looked like Dan

I'm so stupid, don't you dare agree

George reading his peppa pig princess book in the kitchen

Gregor slipping on the ground and ton being a Maori warrior

Ayva saying Hika Ma

Spitting toothpaste on the wall with mum and ton

Bly reaching over me to get a chip and I thought she wanted a hug

"I want your Virgin ears to hear the song" "well I don't have virgin ears"

Georgette spitting her drink out all over the food and plate of tomato sauce

Mum waking up in the when we got out the chips

Dad buying yuck chocolate

Ops are ops

Don't touch my intimate places

Hurry up or I'll pish in a bush

Who's that crazy woman talking to herself, mum telling us where to drive in the motel

I'm gonna push you out of that window

Do a u-ie

Cams serious as face at go-karting

Everyone betting that Wayne would win at bowling but dad did

Playing basketball in the arcade getting handy as into it

Being curry munchers

Going for a swim in the pool, ton smacking her face on the wall.

Bye Felicia

Deese nuts

Being hyper as bk

Ice t

Pushing olea off the bed

You sound like siri

Olea cracking up at my british accent saying bread

At 7 past 10 do you want some burnt bread

The ducks laugh at me

Olea recording me talking about helmets

Af

If I could wear one thing for the rest of my life it'd be just glasses

Petty pets

I'd let my kid wear that

Ellen got a boyfriend today guys

Playing cards at institute

Why are there cars here what are they doing?  The nasty

Olea judging me for adding Jayden

I'm still upset I lost my headband

Shhhhh

How is it only Wednesday this week is taking soooo long, oh sorry

Have i talked about patriarchal blessings yeah here's mine. How is it on there? I took a photo! Oh I thought you scanned it

I feel awful inside

The Rock is huge, not as huge as my head yaaaaass

Sacachaweea

Sackajewea

See you're the reason! For the teardrops on my guitar

"Acapella is for people who didn't make it into cheerleading" "oi you" "I can't sing"

The jokes going right over oleas head

Finding that wild cat and it following us home

And juice can be our topping, ew, don't be a sook

Confession times. I didn't give my McDonald's to the homeless.

 Dermatologist hate her

These glasses are......HURTING YOUR EYES

Talking to Antonio antarge and teah on the phone, How Antonio explained Marcus being in america, aw a little bit of business but for a holiday aswell

U wot m8

Everyone has 2 legs ESPECIALLY DUCKS

Does drake even have crying songs or does he just make you cry

Is there anything I can do, uh stop breathing ahahaha when the windows were fogging up in the car

Elvis presley gospel YES

I don't get this part how can you act like sour milk all on the floor

Where are we it's dark i can't see

Glease

I miss my cat, me too

You change your mind quickly, yeah nah

People feel comfortable telling you their secrets Yes

Horiana having a mamae and kaata asking if it was from what they did last night......wrestling

We go toilet together I sit down and he goes through my legs

Your spray is on your shirt THAT'S MY SWEAT PATCHES

I got eagle aw no Ruru eyes

Dropping the chair and hori getting a fright

Your spot, it looks like you're mouldy

"No-one cares" "I was talking to Caleb" "he's no-one" *takes offence*

Rai dying when Jade sprayed the spray in class

Jade you're all grown up!! Yup I'm 13 now!

Hori not being capable of whispering when everyone was tryna sleep

Ton telling us how Dorsey punched a hole in the toilet

Kaata getting his jersey from the lost property

I got maroon sneakers at pak n save

Come on henry

Looks like he's giving him head

Who's are those tits

Dropping my chewing gum and Donald coming up behind saying eat it eat it

Get the kids some drinks aw yep on it

What was she gonna cut? Jades shorts tryna put her leggings on

I wanna ride someone new YUP, donald.

Taking selfies out the window

Don't fall on my mums car ahahaha Georgette talking about our van

Mine and joeys wedding at the botanicals

Rais hideous as face in the video like a spaz

Where's the toilet aw there's a bush, go in the cactus

SHES POOING

Everything you do is slow ole actually get offended

Ton dropping Rai like just straight on the ground.

When rerepo turned the camera on and it was so dark that I thought he hung up

Far my teeth are perfect!!

At the museum seeing the statue of 3 old ladies. You being nosey, Olea on her phone, And me prepared for the rain

Excuse me lenny? Uh I said beep beep beep ole

I'd rather shave mine Karyn about her eyebrows

When Hori sings my nipple goes hard

Whatatutu anywho

Camryn I knew you when you were a baby

Teagan tells ton all her and rerepos problems HER MEDICAL PROBLEMS?

Talking to aunty debbie about how Maoris can drive on learners Kia ora! Kei te pehea koe!

David making those reminders in Rais calendar for like 20 years

How old is his baby? Idk like 10 ole had it when he was 9, talking bout Dylan

Connie

Ton telling rerepo she went to the campion ball with Haven

Grabbing out my to do list and ton saying that was like our map to our adventure

Shhhhh Shhhhh I can hear something, aw wait I can hear something too, you're talking nonsense

Boom Jurnees tryna suck me off! Ahahahahah bly running over to David thinking it was Kaata!

At Vaughan that's why the longs so line coz you ate everything, at maccas

Mum believing kaata and hori pissing together

I won't chew the steeeeeeeaak

Come on whanau ahahaha mum at preschool and we all just laughed at her!!

Chating Tanning, mum tryna tell the story of how the news lady said his name wrong but then she said it wrong.

"Can you get me some of that" *sam comes in and grabs the whole plate* "he's like a fkn squirrel"

If I stay Halo, just setting the mood

Skyping aunty jo. What are yous doing? Just standing ahahaha Shane

Azrael saying It's snowing cats and dogs

Who you tryna look pretty for? My daaamn self, Huruteas eyelashes

What if we had a muscle in our nose and we could do this. When I meet my genie that's my wish ahahaha the pig nose thing

Huruteas #dontjudgemechallenge with indian music an then we were all cracking up handy at her when she was tryna be pretty

Running through mountains to find the coin, aryanna when th coin fell down huruteas top

Playing go fish "hooooonest?"

Naht Nats

"Numb has a b in it" "nah but my tongues still numb tho"

I don't know all those songs, I can learn them

12 likes right here, I log on then log off

Size 12 handbag

I used to shun people who said haich, did you haich them

That's why huruteas planning her wedding coz she's tidy and we're here sitting in our own filth

Sleeping in the couch cheek to cheek

You can only take 3 bras on ur mission  do you change ur bra everyday? I don't,  I don't have the resources

I'll go barter her for it

I was born in water that's why you constantly feel like you're drowning

I'm gonna wear all my rings on one finger so then when I'm like hi nice to meet u

I need my fingers to swell up, do the Kylie jenner lip challenge ole give yourself hickeys

Slut horns

Ole meghan Trainor!

Far when I was your fullas age I was an asshole

Needa find Ellen someone to dance with. To dance the dance of life with.

Yeah Simon we bought him up, not like in life

Are you an electrician coz you light up my world, nah I'm an electrician coz I turn you on

What's 5+5 twenty one

Hurutea recording the song but not stopping it

Some guy wearing huruteas hat

We all had a good lol

Don't sleep at the lake mate

Adios amigos ahahah Kingston on the motorbike

Is your name Ellen page?

I'm gonna fart on this cat

Fridge it

"Oi what's the fish and chip shops number" "ole just ask me coz I'm fat, ask your fucken boyfriend steven"

Both the 2 oldest virginities

I dunno how Rai and jade watched it at school? And what didn't get aroused? 50 shades

Why are u looking good for its just wta. U wanna see Tiare aye. Ahahahah when we went to pick Jade up

My eyes were blocked

Hori smelling her fingers like pepperoni and ton saying like on human centipede

Stains at ur pregnant and ur leaking milk

"What's the backup password?" "I dunno do I look like kaata!?"

"Jaaaa" "you were gonna call Rai jade aye?" "No Jah"

Spreen Cotector

Unlockme.com sound like a naughty website

Hori putting the squashed cap down my top and me being like skull theeese

Tikitikitikitiki

My boy, or should I say my gent ahahhahahahaha Jade about Hunara

Rai not getting tagged in jurnees status "nah I didn't get tagged fuck your rights!"

Playing the celebrity name game "c c c c SEE MORE BUTTS" Robert DeNiro d d d DEEZ NUTZ"

Nah were  coming down to hold ur hat while u spew

Squad rule no phones so i had to write down my memz on a paper

"I like it how he says his full name" "what Jeff Chinese"

Taller or shorter? Shorter so he can lick my tits

I think he's on crack, Caleb talking about his brother

How come you don't call me? I DON'T HAVE YOUR NUMBER ahahah Dad and Jai

She's not sitting on my lap not if she's had dinner

Where is she? Probably eating a pie

Don't bring those uni tricks here ahahaha when Buck dropped his drink

Pushing Ton off the chair

Salt dances, Jurnees hansim peanut fingers

Daniels been pulling on her tongue piercing

Where's Tristan? Up my ass! Whaaaaat!?

I feel like I'm in area 51

You should be Rapunzel

Thats white girl greasy maori greasy is when you can make fry bread with it!

He looks about 11? A lemon!?

Charge u of a salt

You had to be here

Music turns off aaaaaaaaaaa ole Harmony

Use the potty ahahah Ton telling Jade

Do the haka just ka mate ka mate real fast!

Don't eat it donny!! Nah to Donny when the dog ran past!

Can u be kind? WHAT!?

Omg she's like fucking me ahahah Aroha when we were all squashed in the shed and someone was dancing by her

I feel like I'm on crack ahahaha when we were going to sleep at Jacks

Jade singing my neck my crack, we'll I gotta find someway to get myself to sleep sing myself to sleep

They said, David?? They ngaw it's t not dey ABCDEY

"Tamaras read all 3 books" "has she the dirty little minx" "what a hoebag!"

What time is huias game tomorrow? 4 Aw what time?

The doors open and---that's not our dog??

Right rab the ouija board

Are we watching it on that white sheet? Nah on ur forehead Donald

What are we having with our ice cream, are we having cones? Nah bongs!

Can some of these idiots sleep in ur room Kara? Naaaah

Pak n save pak n save countdown pa n save pa n save oh nah pak n save

Is this your house? Nah we just came here and turned  lights on for a feed

Have a double tangi half mongrel mob half Tongan seig ow bo bo ahahah Kaata talking nonsense about Mackey and Davids funeral whentheyre 80 and gave each others clothes back

Might get a makabush walk through half way, I already have a makabush right in front, Talking about movies being video at the movies

Aw and Tarms move your head aw no that's your bum

Yous got a lot of cockroaches! Yes they're family

That was like a spew burp!

I would just smash the laptop and go to church ahahahaha Brandon when we were watching Unfriended

Ntn nice to now aww Kaata ahahaha

This gum is weird if sticks to my teeth?  I make it tight by drinking water

I got this to match my eyes

Aw I'm so glad you're here

Say please

Lesbians

Without the kissing

Emotional lesbians

How many takes does it take to get the scene

Detergent, aw the palmolive series

How do you spell his last name? I'm not gonna tell u

Ellen Matiaha. Just at the marae yeah I'm a Matiaha

I don't know any of these songs but their....calming

This is where my instagram come in handy...dandy notebook

I never sleep on that side. You said you sleep there all the time? I sleep everywhere

How do you genuinely tell if a guy is into you?

Ole grandpa laugh, koro

Splitting image

The font is ugly. Is it comic sans? No? Then we have nothing to worry about

How much do you like sherbet, little sherbet

Sherbetcha

Oh I like ur shorts, they don't like you

They went skydiving before they're wedding. What I'd they died? Ur so stupid. What do you mean what do you mean *not listening* what do you mean

You look like aryanna. Uh maybe because she's my sister. I'm so funny

I have to get a world record in dating before I go. Like breakfast lunch and dinner, 2 at a time like Mrs doubtfire

ME and Daniel were spose to go to England but then he had a baby. Like we didn't breakup

How hard olea laughed when I tried to press play on the how to trick an idiot video

Did you just say d-d-devil child? Did you just stutter? Scared to say his name d-d-devil. Are you a dj? D-d-drop the bass

They were intimidating like they had the whole tribe

Corn braiding my hair

Jimmy timmy Jackson and big Mike

You look like Eminems sister

Hori commenting all those emojis on Daniels emotional status

Yah hurd

Yeah i delighted from my phone

Ballies are greater than god

Mum going off about tons nits "they're my friends"

Bly calling me out for being someone who doesn't answer their phone

Hohepas voice mail ahahahaha!!!

Do you know Muru? Muru James?

Aw yeah he's a meeeeean farmer

Small medium or large, ask me a stupid question like that again

Preloved only one bite taken

Tampone

When do you get released? Ole like I'm in jail

I remember I first tried fried bread when I was 12. Our neighbors lay down a hangi

If he doesn't pick up were not friends

Hopeppa pig

I'm granded now! Grannied flick a the wrist sprites turned u into a granny

He did it with Zumba girl ole put her Zumba songs on

Hori slow cooking her meat patties

Rain shouldn't hinder education

We bought oranges DID YOU JUST SAY YOU BOUGHT ORANGES WE HAVE 4 TREES AT HOME sorry while we were evacuating the house we didn't think to pick oranges

Our baggage staying in the rain with heart

OMG is that dinosaur real?

Is that a fish

Mac ordering a bloody Mary on the plane

Percy running around at peppa pig

Getting off the plane in our nz shirts "aw are you going to the game now? "

Do u want any mark? No? Well u have to? Bonnies just said how yuck it is

There it is. Woop there it is

Percy running around for Peppa Pig

Ole chewing gum on fleek

Poppycock

Hold her hand no I'm not lesbian

Run.

The one who sat on my muslins?

Who died that bird?

Yummy in my willy

Mum putting her whole sandwhich in the toaster and straight away saying don't judge me

Jason coming in fully kitted ready for the little boys rugby training

Af. After christ

She's a really nice lady but I can't hear her

Is this omen? No? Nomen

Do u want some wine? No its a sin

Dad talking about our native heritage to everyone

The man with the tiny lawnmower

I want a big dog like Jason.  You should join the police! You don't just get to take them home at the end of the day

Is there a ding dong

Ur too ugly to be from Georgia

Excuse moi. U speaka da french?

Why have u got such a pretty dog? Well I'm coming out aren't i

Let me get in the tunnel

Bev didn't make it

Now what's peppa pig up to

U dirty dirty little boy

Oosh what are yous tryna do summon a spirit with all these candles

Big G fully breaking the chair at the pub

Put your rugby shirt on! Oh I'm going to bed

Maybs falling straight on the ground and just saying "ow"

What happen to ur nose? I hit it on a walnut

Keep on running

Need to invite Mo, oh no your not are you? Well he is just my best friend

It was just a joke, well it was boring

Taking a photo and nana looking at the tv

Was it planned?

Ribena have you seen her?

Are you all kiwis? Hell yeah! Ur not kiwi

I won't tell mummy, or daddy, or Harry that we're having ice cream

Shhhhh a seagull

Sugars the devil

Knocking that girls knife off the table and her looking at me like i just killed her first born child!

Raise ur hand if u think Dan should sell all his cars to pay for the extension? That's exactly why I never will

Dan it's your round. Oh I'm not thirsty

He went to an expensive school and can't spell petrol

Me and lulu are twins

I want a beer, beers for grown ups, but look how tall I am

Shut up

Go away

Do u remember me ahahah that little girl coming up to Ton

Do u want another drink Si? No well I got a race to swim on Saturday

Have we got enough ice cream or should we get the ice cream put of the corneto's

Ton falling down the stairs to get my shoes

Going to the Chapel and we're gonna get married, don't do it

Ton falling up the stairs to bring me oj

How many people do they wanna fit on this fuckin plane

Jade screaming at the cars

When the fireworks were on jade going fuck yeah!!

"There you suit him ellen" has a look "ole Ellen had a good enough stare?"

You needa be a member, let's sign up, to a fishing club?

Whispering about Tiare, ole whispers ahaha yeah well were in wta he might hear, yeah well with ur fat mouth!

Do u think I'm funny? I think ur disgusting. Well ur not wrong

Seans license photo

Live hard die young

Ellen show some leg so you can get us some more fish and chips

That's why you need boyfriends

I love the cougar boys. What you like kutu boys? Nah that's you

Its got Tanning Chatum in it!!

How long until I can have the kitten? Say it one more time and I'll kill it.

I rang him up and was like oi and he was like yeah and I was like hello

"I need you to get me some aloe vera water" "no I dont"

7 heconds in seaven

Why don't we all just make an effort? Why don't you get off your head

Can you grab that Brown blanket Jai? No

Well do we have jokers? You dont

Did I sneeze on you thou? ahahaha when funny sneezed and i said ew

Shoulda bought some lamb tails Hun? Shall we go dock some? I seen a few three? 1 two half?

When the fire splashed and ton fell off her chair

Aw stuff that I'd rather fall naturally funny talking about the harness swing

Huns toenails on the wall

Horis ugly raised eyebrows in honey I love you

Tough titty

"I couldn't let my boyfriend leave for over 2 years" "it's only 2 years" "aw over a year and a half" funny ahahah

I'm gonna sleep with no undies. It's alright

It's this nice chicken place it's green? Perfect roast? Nah by Sofra? Aw charcoal chicken! That's fucking red bei

Avelee hyphenated maree. Like her actual name is hyphenated, hyphenated is her actually her name

What flavour is the muffin? It's vanilla what do u think?

Do you wear your hat in  the gym? Nah I put it in my bag?

Aw little Jimmy he's only little

Tell him to call me dox

Can I call you hoho

Go to bed

I just brushed my teeth. Why? So I had fresh breath? Why so u can pash me?

Ton clicking her hip on the stripper pole

Can we just eat in peace? Ahahah the girl cleaning at maccas

We're drinking tomorrow? With who? Me hori and her dad

Can u stop waving ur burger around

Can yous shut up everyone's left coz ur so loud

Does rerepo know him? Everyone knows Joseph Ogilvy

Sean mowing our lawns

The blackest bottom of a pan you'll ever see ahahaha throw that in the rubbish antarge

Me and olea laughing at something and then hurutea laughing at me thinking that her and olea were laughing at her

Jacks weird way of putting peanut butter on his wrap, like a dance ahahahah

Writing huruteas email to asher for her

Staring at olea to get her attention in glassons

Mum said it would be like catfish asher

Ew and then he'll fall in love with u. Well someone has 2 one day

Weird jogging on the bus and slipping in my shoe

Olea swearing when she was reading my

I missed my bandwagon well jump on  it now

It's funny when it doesn't happen to you like you know aw those videos with the sex noises ahahah

Straightening oleas hair while I looked like a nan

Smacking olea straight in the face with a cushion

What's wrong with her eyes? Aw she's just asian

What about my nose piercing? What if they just kick u out because ur a devil child

Are u looking at biscuit rescipes

Go and play in the bush kids ahahahaha that house with the messy as garden!

Is that a bouncy ball? Nah it's a flat ball

Finding that barbie doll is a metaphor in life, for finding your self ahahah huruteas speech for olea

I only have 2 friends? Who's that? My mum and dad.

Who's all in there aryanna? Well my dad ahahahahah when we were Straightening our hair and all those elders were there

Hurutea doing the shrunken washcloth and dribbling all the water

Amen, open our eyes, I feel like going to the movies!

Ellie Joy Randall

Can u check if I gave an itchy bite on my bum? Yep ole fast as

Looking at the stars and hurutea makes a fart noise.

All go on our phones. Moments gone.

Olea not locking the bathroom door coz she thought people would know just hear the shower water hahahaha

Breaking oleas freaking bed

Hey don't judge the black power

We have an aux cord so it'll be aux good

Te wera road they named it after me

Hurutea pulling the fingers

Chugalugs dad calling red cups that

Bloody white kid games. What would ur family be playing? Move this table and play bullrush

Your affectionless ole sounds like factionless

She only cares about 2 people me and her bf. And her mummy

Shes that girl off of OITNB, aw yeah, do u watch OITNB? no I just wanted you to shutup

Oh there's mermaid out here! The guys having a pirate party

Ton touching my eye

Losing my scarf and then finding it

That girl spewing

Sugar pie honeylump

Do you have any fruit pies?

Bryan O'Donald

"Oh another one" "what pregnant?"

Talking about Alfie "he's too busy making a living that he's not living his life"

Hurutea scared the fart out of me when we were stalking Suzanna and Antarge

Can I get some chips ahahah hori as ahahaha Hurutea at Maccas

Arrrriana Grande

The dumb lights past Evans

My dad makes everything maori

Talking about Barack Obama in his talk

Pap Ellen doesn't like the window down

Why doesn't he go out with someone we know? Like Ellen or Ton!

I THOUGHT I JUST SAW MY SIAMESE CAT! Ahahah ryan

Excuse me ma'am bloody hohepa when the conveyer belt broke

Gregor mowing over the hose ahahah "well now we just have a shorter hose"

Dad not putting the car in park

Why are your shirts off?? Ahahahah Jai asking Jack and Gregor

Let's just park up and watch their tv

Finding Christmas trees in people's house

She's an experienced driver HOW FAST IS SHE GOING talking about aunty Cath knowing how fast she was going without things lit up

Where are the lights? Aw there the BP they've gone all out!

Dad calling to warn us about the sheep on the road

Is that an island or a boat??

It's a rich taste ahahah jack talking about his cans

You get headaches from wearing the light hat. I don't think I will for a 5 minute bike ride. Well you've been warned!

If you go to hunting and fishing you can get the ones with red lights for hunting.  Well I do do a lot of fkn hunting!

What if I marry a pirate ahahaha mum

Ole jandals tan ole toe jam

Smacking kaatas dome ahaha just generally fighting with him at the river

Ton farting in jades room

I feel like I'm on the piss hahah Bly or Kaata? in the van at the river.